Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Condition RED Line!

Stolen more or less (more less and less more, I guess) verbatim from the MBTA here in Boston:

"Hi, this is Dan Grabauskas, general manager of the MBTA. Safety is our number one concern on the T.

"As our eyes and ears in the system, it's more important than ever for you to keep alert for suspicious behavior and activities. Even though there has not been a significant terrorist attack on a bus, train, or subway in America in our lifetime, even though Boston has never been the target of a significant terrorist attack, and even though there is no reason to think that we will be targeted any time soon, we're relying on you to report any suspicious activities, such as people with funny hats.

"Remember: in these dark times where literally ones of Americans are being murdered by foreigners every day, occasionally within two thousand miles of our borders, paranoia is a virtue and a welcome distraction. So, see something, say something: it's better to wrongfully arrest ten innocent civilians with dark skin than to let one person remember that they are safer in Boston than virtually anywhere else on the planet.

"Please stay tuned for another, back-to-back announcement on the topic of unfounded paranoia, and remember: watch that dirty rotten foreigner two seats down LIKE A HAWK."

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